Despite its ever fleeting drift that has distanced you and I.

As the passing of each season means another 3 months of silence

So I find you in the dandelions, sand and autumn breeze

Yet reminded that it’s departed in the bitter winter morning.

I wonder if the earth keeps you warm and unaware

Of how the fireplace burns with papers and with cards

Scribbled neatly in that solemn tone of yours

Where those last few words you were too scared to say

Now dissipate into ashes that paint our bedroom black and blue

Whilst the living room I’m in hasn’t shut out the cold.

I lament that overwhelming affection.

Wallow in this absence.

Where my eyes and cheeks, hands and nose

Twitch at phantom touches.

I reach out for a fading voice that embraced my name in gentle whispers.

Waiting by the door left unlocked

But it seems that I cannot force myself to let it remain open

If you, who I long for, won’t come in.

Foolish, naive. Stupid little girl.

How cowardly and hopeless is she.

She, whose adoration slips from gaps between her fingers.

Perhaps her hands accursed - condemned.

I guess I really can’t stop things from leaving.

That is why my face distorts in front of the vanity mirror.

A disheveled caricature that is me.

Mascara smudging down cradled with saline tears

But what use if you’re not here

To wipe them away with your caress

Searing my jaw, indenting my chin

The way I needed you to.

I need our breaths to sync like when we stood together.

I will never hear you breathe for me again.

Your kiss as you held my waist, flooding my blood and marrow.

Now your lips are pale and they’ll never chase mine.

I need your body pressed against my own the way it reassured me.

I still feel your presence though, empty as it is.

And the way our eyes caught each other at every intimate glance.

Yet I won’t discover your gaze boring into me anymore.

Maybe that beautiful, consuming ocean

In the abyss of your vision, now black

Couldn’t bear to see what you caused.

Or the wreck of this dismantled house.

Even the person left in it.

I can’t accept survival knowing yours is diminished

Because I carry the weight of two

Even though I’m a forever moving corpse

Until the day our souls reunite the way they did here.

Exhaust our limit of reincarnation.

And I’ll find you in the depths of the end of everything that once began.

However, in this moment you’ve chained me within

I can only but ask you one simple thing

So tell me, my love

Can my heart keep loving if it’s buried with you?

- Riya

I think this is probably the longest poem I’ve written thus far. Literally have not written for months because these exams are actually killing me. Only half a month left and I’ll be done and making more pieces. Hopefully…

I think you know it is you I seek

That your hands intertwine in symmetry with mine

And my heartbeat memorizes the tune of your laughter

Because I grew accustomed to the silence you left behind

Maybe you know what I wish was true

That somehow you could grace what’s still left in me

Reaching for your fleeting touch

For still I must bask in the futility.

Would you ever believe how my days passed by

When you drowned in all those awaited apologies

And the deceit of satisfaction could thus play Satan

Since I am clutched in all its glories.

And I think I know how much you cared,

For every crevice of their mouths that lit up your room

As with each passing year you meet them again

I swear that hope will at last meet its doom.

You notice the pitch of each of their voices

Recognize the way in which your name befalls them

Once more, now I ask, for where they are

The ones I must release yet refuse to condemn.

Indeed how encapsulating was the wave in your hair.

And the familiar golden hue of your sun kissed skin

I would have liked to hold on to that notion

Before it decayed in my eyes of sin.

I don’t think you know of those feather-weight shoulders

The blissful ignorance you claimed to have protected

A privilege I beg to be my right

Because my frame shall drag the inflictions neglected.

So you’re enraptured in every moment you take

Where fields beyond meadows trail your shadow

Yet now they hold your presence in contempt

Isn’t that a hard pill to swallow.

- Riya

I don’t know why this poem took me so long to complete. At first I made it at a certain point where things felt super duper weird and I just hated the way things weren’t going how I wanted them to go. And suddenly I just didn’t feel anything at all so I couldn’t bring myself to write something down. But now I mustered up some sort of motivation to finish it off so here we are!

Stars worship your gaze-

Sparkle against your fluttering eyelashes.

Moons illuminate against your face.

Your noor was always brighter my dear.

Your heart burns brighter than the sun;

Burdens and griefs you try to set alight.

Yet only warm, was your breath and warmer, your touch.

You bite your hands-

Stifle your cry against your throat.

And your chest was bare as your rooh peeked through.

Tainted and stained.

But I found solace in discovering its edges.

As I seep into sinkholes,

With your unbinding love.

And I seek into shadows,

Of your withered words.

“Mere taraf dekho,” you said to me;

Your eyes never turned to me.

Tiptoeing around heartstrings,

Awaiting to meet yours.

You could bury oceans

With the lined palms of your hands.

Pluck a bud from the earth,

Watch it bloom.

So I say “yes I’ve looked at you”.

I’ve never seen anything

Quite like you.

-Riya

>>Made for the most compassionate, caring, loving, understanding, supportive and empathetic person who I adore and love so so much. No one could replace the things you have done for me, Lishyx ♥️

Clouds, ashy and gaunt

Droplets, limp - cascade, harassing her limbs.

Her conscious wavers.

She hides; curls up.

Fetal.

As she writhes - turning.

And her head - falling.

Like the dead cloud’s tears.

And yet, eyes dry, lips sealed,

With the fate, she still knows not of.

Untold.

Unheard.

Whilst the window pane frosts, unlocked and ajar.

The wind reaching for each bruise and wound.

Biting at the skin, freezing the dripping sorrows.

But somewhere, the nightingale heard.

Graced her and settled,

Onto her laps.

Brought her answers to those whispers,

She had held at her lips.

Feathers brushed against her rib.

She stumbles up.

Numb.

Heavy is her body until she grapples the edge

Of the ebony framed glass.

Still open, hinges far back.

And the nightingale, perched in her gentle hands,

Outstretched over the threshold.

Wings taking flight.

Departing with a warm breeze-

Tracing each line on her face.

And softer than those feathers was her smile.

The apples of her cheeks a dusty rose,

Embracing her eyes.

For thus, the storm had passed once again.

- Riya

» This was one of the first poems I had made and was actually as a gift for a friend who loved poetry as well. However I had lost the original copy and only had half of the poem I had typed up previously. Therefore, I created this one, a blend of the new and old. Although not all the exact words, I chose to kept the same idea of the poem and I think it’s just as raw and visceral as the first.